S3 Ep 7 – The Tapping Experience: Ramey Practices an Emotional Self-Care Tool for Her Health Strategy

Oct 17, 2023 | Podcast

Sometimes good medicine is so simple that people don’t even try it. In Episode 7, Ramey is prepared to practice a powerful self-care tool for emotional balance called EFT.

When you learn to become a systems thinker, becoming healthier is not only possible, you believe in yourself again.

 

Be sure to also listen to Episode 6 on Ramey’s preparation for this transformative tapping experience.

 

Ramey Discovers the Power Within

Ramey has years of experience in therapy, as a teacher, and now working in the healthcare system. She reached a place in her life when she was ready to develop her Health Strategy, including a cultivation of mental and emotional well-being.

After her first experience with a tapping technique called, EFT, Ramey said:

“I just feel like this is just more immediate and just something I can immediately take in. And it’s not a pill and it’s not something that’s going to have some side effect. It’s for me, and it’s also made by me… I’m part of it too.”

 

Move Beyond the Traditional Mental Healthcare “Hamster Wheel”

 

My client, Ramey, as she states it best, wants to avoid the “hamster wheel” of “therapy, pills, therapy, pills.”

 

There’s so much more to mental health treatment than just medications and therapy. Although there are amazing and dedicated people in the mental health field, they can only treat so many people at a time.

 

The healthcare system is fragmented and rewards specialists over prevention and self-care.

The best person to get off the hamster wheel between meds and therapy is

You.

 

Based on the current healthcare system, it might seem normal that trauma is permanent, that everyone has to suffer if they’ve had trauma, or that it takes years of therapy and medications to relieve the suffering.

But seeing and hearing are not always believing.

 

You have the freedom to take care of your health according to what’s best for you. It’s time to build back the resilience and the strengths in your system. Your body, mind and spirit have powerful tools to do that.

And one of the ways to access these tools is through tapping.

 

 

Follow Ramey’s Health Journey in Season 3

 

My client, Ramey, reached a point where she wanted to dig deeper to find more health solutions through the Health Strategy Consult program at Third Opinion MD.

Season 3 is about pulling the curtain back so you can learn the process with Ramey on how to form a unique Health Strategy.

 

Resources

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Transcript

Barbara: You’re listening to Third Opinion MD.

Ramey: It’s hard when you have complex stuff that something so simple can help you. That’s, it is hard to, people are like, you know, you need years of therapy to get over this. Years.

Barbara: The more complex something is does not mean it needs to be a more complex treatment. In fact, the simplicity is there for every treatment.

You just have to get to know you. That’s what this whole strategy, why we’re doing all this together now why I had to step outside of the corporate bubble to get to this place, and it is so hard to explain to people. And it’s one of the reasons why we’re doing this whole season about the work we’re doing together.

It just takes more than, it’s hard to believe for them because it’s not in their system, in their mindset of like, “Oh, what? I can do that? And we can be creative creating a canvas for just you?” Yeah, we can do that.

Welcome to Third Opinion, MD podcast. I’m your host, Barbara de la Torre. I’m a physician and artist bringing a blended perspective to you about healthcare and exploring simpler ways to restore and maintain your health.

Today, you’re going to join Ramey and me to train in a technique called EFT, or Emotional Freedom Technique. And it’s a form of tapping that was developed in the West, but it utilizes Chinese medicine principles of acupuncture points. EFT is a self-care tool, but the way I am teaching it to Ramey really requires some guidance.

So, this is not something you should be doing on your own, unless you work with a person trained in EFT. And if it has anything to do with trauma, you need to work with someone who is trained and trauma informed in mental health. This is very vital. What you’re about to hear in the next episode is the actual tapping training session with Ramey.

This is a narrative that’s unfolding. It will make more sense to you to start from the beginning. That way you really understand where she’s coming from and the meaning behind this wonderful technique.

Well, tell me a little bit about any particular issues coming up?

Ramey: I think it’s, yeah, the hardest part is, is not, is I think, because I think I just think about like my dad’s stuff?

There’s, I’m sure there’s a lot of stuff. He’s gone now. And so, all those things, like when he called, and you talked about the pit of your stomach, that kind of feeling, I don’t have that with a parent anymore. So, I’m imagining it comes up in other parts. Uh, when I go to those people…

Barbara: Yeah, let’s go to those other parts.

It would be nice if we can go through a sequence that you can bring something up, but that way when we come back together, we can, it could even be a spontaneous, “Hey, I’m feeling this way. Can you hop on a call?” And I can talk you through it because that’s why I offered the phone.

Ramey: Okay.

Barbara: Cause then you can catch it in the moment.

Cause sometimes it’s about “the fish is right there.” You wanna catch it.

Ramey: Yeah. Yeah.

Barbara: You did talk about even physical stuff. We could even talk about. Are you having any headache right now? Are you having any,

Ramey: No headache. Uh, my anxiety’s been off this week, just like the emotional kind of, and I don’t know if sometimes if it’s windy and the weather. I get like this too.

I notice. Um, so more of like a feeling in this area, I think…

Barbara: Where’s the feeling in the area? If you’re describing it right here. Do you want to tap for that?

Ramey: Yeah. Yeah. Just like an anxiety, sort of breathing.

Barbara: Is it heaviness or does it feel like, or tight or what does it feel like?

Ramey: Tight. Just really tight.

Barbara: Okay.

Ramey: Yeah.

Barbara: Okay.

Ramey: And not in like an illness way. A lot of anger this week, too. I don’t know where that is. My poor husband, but just, you know. I’m just, yeah, it’s “everyone leave me alone” is really, you know, that kind of, uh,

Barbara: Well, I, I want to tell you, it’s an honor for you to spend time with me like this.

I mean…

Ramey: Oh, I appreciate it.

Barbara: Yeah, I get it. And by the way, wind and Liver are connected, too. Let’s do , let’s even go into where you, what, are you feeling right now?

Ramey: I, just more of like a tightness of, probably because we were talking about childhood stuff and all of that sort of …

Barbara: Did that, did that start to rise when you think about your childhood?

Okay. Why don’t, why don’t we work on, what is it about your childhood that comes up? And we can just focus on one thing right now. What is it that’s, that you’re feeling?

Ramey: Sorry. I think it’s, um, the big, the, the one thing I really wrote down was, uh, rejection. This rejection was the first thing I wrote down.

Barbara: Okay. Let’s, let’s tap for that right now. Okay. You ready? Okay. Find your sore spot. Find your sore spot. Pick which one. Which one?

Ramey: This one.

Barbara: Okay. Rub the one sore spot. And even though I feel rejected as a child, I deeply and completely accept myself.

Ramey: I don’t know if I can say that out loud yet.

Barbara: Um. Okay. I’m going to say it for you as you do this, okay?

Ramey: Thank you.

Barbara: But I want you to think it. Even though I feel rejected as a child, I deeply and completely accept myself. And if you can start to say it, say it, even though I feel rejected as a child,

Ramey: Even though I feel rejection as a child,

Barbara: I deeply and completely accept myself.

Ramey: I deeply and… accept myself.

Barbara: Okay, start tapping and say rejected as a child.

Ramey: Rejected as a child.

Barbara: Tap, inner eyebrow, side of the eye, rejected as a child.

Ramey: Rejected as a child.

Barbara: You can do both if you want to. Under the eye, rejected as a child.

And check in again on what that intensity level was. I’m assuming it was a 10.

Ramey: Yeah, you got it.You got, I don’t know how I did it. Sorry. I, well, I’m just going to apologize, that’s probably what I was supposed to do. It was the first thing I wrote down and I didn’t want to even say it, and I did.

Barbara: Now tell me, when you try to think about that again, what number is it compared to where you were before?

Ramey: Oh, it’s, it’s definitely down to like a seven. I mean, I can still get there as we go and I keep saying it. Um, so I would say it’s, uh, it’s definitely, hoo, come down from that.

Barbara: You can talk, you can talk.

Ramey: I couldn’t even talk. I couldn’t even say the word to you without…

Barbara: Let’s keep going. Rejected as a child, that’s a really good one to start with. Really good. I’m so proud.

Ramey: I went right there.

Barbara: I’ve got to tell you; I am so proud of you. This is really good.

Ramey: It’s a point of it.

Barbara: Let’s bring it down. Let’s bring it down. So, we’re at a, so now I want you to check in again. And what number would you give it? Is it still a seven?

Ramey: It’s, it’s still, it’s seven, eight.

It’s still up there, but it’s definitely, I’m talking, I’m not feeling that.

Barbara: Let’s give it a seven, and let’s go ahead and rub the sore spot again. You can pick either one, even though, and you’re going to say it out loud now, “Even though I was rejected as a child,

Ramey: rejected as a child.

Barbara: I deeply and completely accept myself.

Ramey: Okay.

Barbara: Where are you right now?

Ramey: I’m, I’m, I’m still in that…

Barbara: Which number?

Ramey: I think it’s the remaining, uh, which number, or? Which, um?

Barbara: Number. What number would you give that?

Ramey: I’m like, it’s still the seven as it starts out okay. And then I think it’s, I mean, because I’m living it as an adult, too, that I don’t have that, you know, I’m still rejected as the adult.

Barbara: Oh, now, so let’s focus. Okay, so that’s an Aspect. That’s an Aspect. Let’s go to the adult. Let’s go to where you are right now.

Okay? Where is the number now? Has it gone up?

Ramey: It’s gone up, yeah.

Barbara: Okay, what situation are you rejected?

Ramey: Um, the, who, the people.

Barbara: Yeah, my family? Rejected by my family?

Ramey: My family, my mom, my sister.

Barbara: Okay, how about, “Even though I’m rejected by my childhood family?” Does that seem to ring?

Ramey: Yeah.

Barbara: Go ahead and rub the sore spot.

“Even though I’m rejected by my childhood family,”

Ramey: “Even though I’m rejected by my childhood family,”

Barbara: “I deeply and completely accept myself.”

Ramey: “I deeply and completely accept myself.

Barbara: “Even though I’m rejected by my childhood family,”

Ramey: “I’m still rejected by my childhood family, I deeply and completely accept myself.”

Barbara: “Rejected by childhood family.”

Now just focus on rejected by childhood family while I give you the instruction.

Ramey: That’s incredible!

Barbara: I want you to tell me where you were before. What number was it before?

Ramey: It was like an eight. It was moving up. And then it was almost like, yeah, and then I don’t know why. I don’t know if it’s because I know why I am rejected by them. And it’s a very good reason. And I have no problem with why I set my boundaries, but it’s still the pain of the rejection itself.

So I think, um, I’m telling myself that that’s still okay.

Barbara: What number is that now?

Ramey: Oh, I’d say it’s even almost a six now, even lower than the childhood.

Barbara: Good. So, let’s keep going. Now we’re going to go with this new Aspect. So, what, what is happening… and we’ll talk about it in a little bit.

Ramey: Yeah, yeah.

Barbara: That’s great.

What happens is see how when something goes up, then we have to think, “Where’s the other tree?” And the tree was “still rejected by,” you know, I’m, as an adult, rejected by my childhood family.” So, let’s take this statement of, “Even though I’m rejected by my childhood family, I deeply and completely accept myself.”

We’re now going to say, “Even though I’m still rejected by my childhood family,” and it’ll be “remaining rejection, remaining rejection.” Okay, ready? Sour spot. “Even though I’m still rejected by my childhood family,”

Ramey: “Even though I’m still rejected by my childhood family, I deeply and completely accept myself.”

Much better.

Barbara: What’s, what’s the number? Think of a number, where you are. If you’re not a six, where are you now?

Ramey: I’m down, I’m down in like a three or a four, I feel like. That I’m able to say it the whole time. Um, I don’t feel that sense of anxiety working up, sort of knew that this was gonna be happening.

So I think that’s why my anxiety was heightened because

Barbara: Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.

Ramey: Um, yeah, that I can say that the second piece about myself, ’cause I think that’s the hardest, the hardest part.

Barbara: Let’s keep going. We’re not at zero yet.

Ramey: Okay.

Barbara: Great.

Ramey: We keep going until we’re at zero! Okay.

Barbara: That’s the goal.

Ramey: Okay.

Barbara: Don’t stop until it’s zero.

And what you did was brilliant. What happened was a great example of, we started off with one Aspect, or thought, and it led to the one that was like, “Hey, I’m the tree you need to knock down first,” you know, and that’s, what’s happening. And if you knock down the right tree first…

And you know, it’s funny. You’re like, “how do I know?” Well, your body just told you. You just, you just told yourself. Your inner doctor is there. And says, “Oh, no, this is the tree. We start now.” Then we go back, maybe, because that tree might knock it out. So we’re at, uh, is it a three?

Ramey: It’s almost like a two now I’m like, I’m just lowering.

I just thought I’d have anxiety when you said before, “do it, we’re doing it again,” my anxiety goes up because I think I’m feeling, “I’m going to feel feelings now.” So, all right. Okay.

Barbara: So, it’s, so it’s now a two?

Ramey: Yeah, I mean, I just feel like a little just that feeling has gone away, this…

Barbara: What feeling? Can you describe it?

Ramey: Tightness. My anxiety will manifest sometimes in like shorter breaths. I mean, shorter breathing. Um, just a feeling of, “this is really tight.”

Barbara: What is tight? The throat?

Ramey: My throat.

Barbara: You’re pointing to your throat right now?

Ramey: This area.

Barbara: Upper chest. Okay.

Ramey: You know, when you’re kind of getting that, when you’re crying and you’re like that, you can’t breathe.

That’ll be that. That’s that feeling. Although I know I can.

Barbara: Does it feel like there’s like a something like a ball in your throat at all?

Ramey: A little bit. Yeah.

Barbara: Does that, where’s that, is that ball there now?

Ramey: No, it’s gone.

Barbara: When did it go away? Which number was it still there?

Ramey: It started to go away after the second time, um, and into the third time, I felt it where I started to feel it again a little bit on one of the things we were saying, and as we moved down into my hands in this area, and I kept saying the rejection part, I started to feel it again.

And then it just went, it would just level out back down again.

Barbara: The globe or the ball in your throat is gone?

Ramey: Yeah.

Barbara: That’s wonderful.

Ramey: Yeah.

Barbara: Okay. We’re, we’re at about a two now. Right. Yeah. Okay. Now sometimes these can, you might, that’s why I like people to take, you know, maybe a few moments to let it integrate and sometimes it can even go down further, but sounds like it’s right at a two.

And since we’re now at like this really low number, we’re going to try something to see if it can lower to zero without having to go through the whole sequence. This is a shortcut, but I only recommend this when you’re like between 0. 5 and 2.

Ramey: Yeah.

Barbara: Okay. So, this is the Gamut. We’re going to just start because we’ve already done the setup and we’re going to think about remaining rejection, remaining rejection.

So, I’m going to have you with the Gamut, tap the whole time and start. This is going to be with your eyes looking completely down and scanning upward, very slow motion. And when you reach the top, you can stop tapping.

Ramey: There’s nothing. I mean, I won’t say nothing, but there’s just.

Barbara: Do you know what nothing feels like on that one?

Ramey: Right?

Barbara: I mean, it’s a question. Do you know what that…

Ramey: I always say I feel like a normal person when I don’t have anxiety. So, this is what.

Barbara: So would you, what number would you give it now with….

Ramey: I mean, right now I would say I’m close to a zero. I’m not, that anxiety, that I was, that feeling is not there anymore. It’s gone. I can’t say that it wouldn’t come back if I brought in some other things, but like you say, it’s other Aspects. So, it’s other things.

Barbara: When you think about just this one, just the statement of rejected, “still rejected by my childhood family.” Does it evoke anything or is it a zero?

Ramey: It’s at a zero right in this moment.

Barbara: That’s awesome.

Ramey: Yeah.

Barbara: That’s wonderful.

Ramey: Yeah. Yeah. Yay.

Barbara: Yay. That is a demonstration. That is a beautiful demonstration of tapping. And it’s tapping with a focus and with strategy and with a purpose.

And what you just did was you knocked down a tree. You know, of an emotional, a negative emotional tree. And you notice how it, at a ten, you couldn’t talk.

Ramey: Could not,

Barbara: Could not even talk. And at an eight, you couldn’t utter the whole statement.

Ramey: Yeah.

Barbara: At a six you could, but there was still that globus, what we call globus or ball in your throat sensation in your throat.

And, then, at a two, you were able to talk about it. And even kind of find a reason to explain why you’re not feeling it, you know, like, “Oh, it must’ve been, it must’ve been just because it’s something I’ve thought about or I’m no longer experiencing.”

In other words, it’s so hard to believe that you’re explaining away. And then now you, if you try to say that statement again, it’s down to zero. If it’s only just this one tree related to the rejection, it will stay at zero. So, this particular statement will stay at zero. It may bring up another Aspect that becomes more specific, but you have just done an amazing thing.

You are really good at this, first of all. And I think that the EMDR does give you a nice base.

Ramey: Yeah.

Barbara: One, to be, to feel safe, to focus your attention on something that we put walls up to protect ourselves from. Those of us that have anxiety or depression know this really well.

Ramey: Yeah.

Barbara: Walling something off prevents us from feeling it. And in this case, it’s not the feeling’s fault. It’s the energetic disruption. And in order to tackle that energetic disruption, the feeling has to be in the zone of awareness.

Good job.

Ramey: Thank you. I, uh, I didn’t know that that was going to happen, but I knew, I did know when I wrote down that word that I wasn’t going to be able to stop it. And I think that’s what EMDR helped me to is that you just have to trust it and not judge that.

Well, this isn’t the right feeling, or this is too much of a feeling, or this is just, “Let your brain do it and see what happens.”

Barbara: That’s the beauty of this whole thing, right? That you don’t have to worry about is this right or not right? It’s just information.

Ramey: Right.

Barbara: And so, we just wrote down the scaling down to zero, just super exciting.

Ramey: That was, yeah, I feel a lot better. Yeah, thank you.

Barbara: I’m glad you feel better.

Ramey: Yeah.

Barbara: That’s that’s the intent.

Ramey: Yeah.

Barbara: This is again, just the beginning. Right.

Do you mind sharing. your experience with learning tapping for the first time?

Ramey: So, I didn’t, I came in knowing almost nothing about it. Just some background, a little bit of background that people do it to help them in times of anxiety and maybe help them through some trauma and immediately.

Sorry, when you started talking through the steps and the, as soon as I saw the mantra, I was going to have to say, I, uh, that’s when my anxiety went up as someone who’s had some trauma, uh, in their childhood and adult life, that that can be very scary. And also saying like affirmations is a very uncomfortable thing to do. And I couldn’t even do it when we started.

I couldn’t, I don’t even know if I could even look at the screen when we first started, when you said, “All right, now pick an aspect.” And I had rejection written down. I had heights because I thought heights would be like a really easy one to go to.

That’d be a nice little, I could go there. It’s a little easier, the easier path. And my, my body, my brain would not let me in that moment. We, I picked rejection and that’s what I was feeling. And so, I just let myself go with that.

I think also for my brain of having the affirmation and the tapping and then going through the process also gave me, my brain, sort of a purpose instead of like crying and getting all this emotion out of just, “Okay, now we’re switching gears we’re doing this.”

So maybe the logical part of my brain sort of took over that part, rational part of like, “Okay, we’re, there’s a process we’re going to get through this.”

Barbara: And there’s a kinesthetic portion. There are different ways that we perceive the world. This is where our emotions come from is perception. Our perception is really only what we would call a model of what reality is.

And that’s why our rational mind is like, “Why am I upset about something?” You know, we, we’ve become so normalized to the idea of trauma being, “Well, everyone has to suffer because they’ve had trauma.” That is not true. We have to build back in the resilience and the strengths in our system, in our, our health and our body and mind and spirit to be able to do that.

And one of the tools is tapping.

Ramey: And I’ve had that experience with EMDR where I could, I know that that emotion, there is a way my brain can process through it in different ways to get to a sort of a baseline, maybe you could call it. I felt like I could trust that process of that.

I could get, I’m just not going to judge it. I’m not going to make it go a certain way. It’s just going to be. And if it takes six times for me to get down to zero, then I have to be honest with that. And yeah.

Barbara: And that’s okay. Remember, when there’s something that has multiple aspects, it will often take more than once.

Every aspect has its own requirements because the heights is funny. It actually is a little more difficult than the rejection one. Because people think it’s just the height, but it’s not just the height.

Ramey: I know it’s not.

Barbara: There’s actually multiple aspects to it. And so, some people have a fear of like water, or fear of enclosed spaces, and there’s usually more than one Aspect.

We oversimplify those phobias. Phobias are fascinating, and they respond so well to tapping that you don’t have them again.

Ramey: I’m excited.

Barbara: And here’s the cool thing about the tapping that I found too, is that with phobias, it’s not that it makes you not smart. You keep your rational concern for things like, “Don’t step off a cliff at Grand Canyon.”

You know, I mean, this is, these are things that they write books about people that have suffered these things. Instead, you retain the rational mind of not doing things that would put you in danger and you get rid of the irrational fears. and anxiety about those situations.

Ramey: Yeah. That would be, that would be amazing.

Barbara: That’s pretty amazing. You did amazing today!

Ramey: Thank you! I knew it was coming. I could feel it. I think that’s why my anxiety was, I was like tapping and it always starts here. So, it always starts with that.

Barbara: But where did we end up?

Ramey: We ended up at a, almost a zero. So…

Barbara: Is it almost, or did it get to zero?

Ramey: I feel like right now it’s a zero. I feel like I’m laughing. I’m thinking about it still, I’m aware, and I’m not, yeah.

Barbara: Let’s celebrate the zero, that you did it.

Ramey: Yeah.

Barbara: That tendency in a system, we have a certain body of knowledge and a way of rationalizing things. And in Western medicine, we have biomedicine rationality, and it’s this container.

Even I, when I learned this technique, in addition to all the things that I’ve learned in different systems, that part of my mind was like, “What the heck, that doesn’t make any sense.” But if you look at it from a different body of knowledge in a different system… If it’s an energetic disruption and we just restored the energetic flow in the right direction, like taking the battery and putting it in the right direction in your device, you now have a zero.

Of course you do.

Ramey: Of course. I’m just interested. Yeah. I’m just, it’s just so interesting to me how that piece of where we started as a child and then we realized that wasn’t the tree didn’t get that other tree. That we moved into my adult, um, and how I needed to do both to get to the zero

Barbara: Yeah, you needed to go to where you are now. This is where most of the emotion comes up because the childhood one may not be necessary based on the therapy you’ve done potentially, or they might come up. But the fact that it’s “the now,” I just, I love it. I love it.

Therapy is not a bad thing. It’s just not the only thing and by itself can be potentially, you can potentially hit a dead end.

Ramey: And that’s exactly. And obviously I wasn’t done with my therapy, with my journey. Right? But we, I had hit a dead end. And it, it took a whole year to get to this point, and I still wasn’t dealing with that rejection piece, just dealing with all the little traumas along the way, but I still hit the dead end.

Barbara: Medicine and health, when you have a good strategy, can be simple. So simple that people don’t even want to believe or try it.

Ramey: Yeah. Yeah.

Barbara: And it can be fun. So, we’re having more fun than you expected.

Ramey: We’re having more fun. Exactly.

Yeah. And that the complex traumas can’t, like the simple, it’s hard when you have complex stuff that something so simple can help you.

That’s, it is hard to, people are like, you know, you need years of therapy to get over this. Years.

Barbara: The more complex something is does not mean it needs to be a more complex treatment. In fact, the simplicity is there for every treatment. You just have to get to know you. That’s what this whole strategy. Why we’re doing all this together now. Why I had to step outside of the corporate bubble to get to this place. And it is so hard to explain to people. And it’s one of the reasons why we’re doing this whole season just about, about the work we’re doing together. It just takes more than, it’s hard to believe for them because it’s not in their system, in their mindset of like, “Oh, what? I can do that? And we can be creative creating a canvas for just you?”

Yeah, we can do that.

Ramey: Um, by the end of the tapping, I felt like I was really, I’m like the pattern. I was looking at you less.

Barbara: Notice how fast you can get with this, that you can do the whole series of six to eight times in less than 10 minutes.

Ramey: That’s amazing.

Barbara: Without having to see a therapist.

Ramey: Right. Which I won’t do. I mean, I won’t. And I’ll tell you, I’ve been there. I’ve had EMDR for myself, for my own trauma. It’s interesting, but I also didn’t like being on the receiving end of it. When I got to a point, it’s very similar to you where it was just sort of like, what am I doing here?

Barbara: I’m paying you this all this money and We have to like get myself to somewhere and I don’t even know where to go and and I don’t even I’m not even a part of it. I’m just doing what you tell me. So, this is, for you, the ability to be in the driver’s seat This is why I’m so excited for you.

And again, I I’m saying that EMDR is a good tool. It gets people there and some people do really, really well, but not everybody does because if we don’t put ourselves in the active role of CEO or the driver, you may revert back.

Ramey: Absolutely. A hundred percent. I feel like EMDR was like the triage I needed in that moment of, if I don’t do something now, it’s, there is, it’s, I need immediate care.

That was the triage I needed. And then this can be the, you know, as things come up, yeah. I’m very excited about it.

Barbara: Wonderful. The next time we meet, Ramey, we’ll go over any questions you have about the tapping. We might even meet on the phone for like a brief amount of time. And in the meantime, what I encourage you to do is to tap. Tap for anytime you have a physical sensation, you know, it’s nice to focus on these things. You can notice them.

Like when you write down the number, for example. You’re going to practice and you say you’re like at a nine, what do you feel in the body? And just write that down. There’s no expectation. This is the trick.

The best success you have is by just noticing. And if it goes up, like you were so good, you were saying it goes up because I’m thinking about now.

Fantastic. Oh, there’s an Aspect. And if it’s more specific, even better because that’s how we brought both things to zero. So, I encourage you to do that and then we can schedule the next appointment.

I’m so excited for you, by the way, I, I, this, I mean, I’m just telling, I am like a kid when I, you know. It just gives me a lot of satisfaction to work with people and, and even little, these little things. You did, you did amazing.

Ramey: Yeah. Yeah. Well, thank you. It’s a, it’s a big one. That’s a big one.

Barbara: It’s a big, it’s a big, big change.

Ramey: It showed up right away.

Barbara: It was like a redwood man. That was a…

Ramey: Exactly, it was the old growth.

Barbara: If there’s someone out there that wanted to work on this kind of consult, but they were thinking that this was too expensive or they weren’t sure if they were making a mistake, is there anything that you wanna share with them right now, at least during the process?

Ramey: I, yeah, I mean the expensive part I totally get, but I, I did so much, I did a year of EMDR and that, you know, it’s expensive no matter what you do. I mean, it’s just, healthcare is expensive. I could pay a therapist money to do this and work for a year.

I just feel like this is just more immediate and just something I can immediately take in. And it’s not a pill and it’s not something that’s going to have some side effect. It’s for me and it’s also made by me to like, I’m part of it too. So that piece of it. I’m not having to wrestle with all these outside things. It’s so worth it to me, the money to not have to talk about insurance and to not have to talk about billing or, you know, all of that.

There’s a little bit of tyranny involved with the insurance company and they’re in

Barbara: Just a little. Yeah.

Ramey: Yeah. Right.

It’s a little bit more freeing in that, uh, the healthcare system we have set up. It’s the, it’s the, I want to say freedom. That sounds so ridiculous, but it does feel,

Barbara: But is it? Is it really ridiculous to say you have the freedom to take care of your health according to what’s best for you?

Ramey: Right. And then it’s not that I need lorazepam, you know. That I can actually take this and actually address these feelings that I have instead of trying to either mask them or stifle them or make me feel flat lined. I’m not feeling feelings anymore. That piece, because I can easily do that. I could easily take a drug and not feel anything ever again.

And that would be fine.

Barbara: And you can also wall it emotionally and not, feel it.

Ramey: Yeah. And shove everybody out of my life. You know, I could do that. I’ve seen that then. And also breaking cycles of “the hamster wheel of my family” I call it. And I broke it, and I stepped off, and I’m not going to do that anymore.

I feel like that too with mental health care. I’m not going to do that anymore. I’m not going to be on that track of therapy, pills, therapy, pills, that kind of thing. So…

Barbara: Yeah, it’s the biomedical bounded, what I call bounded rationality track. It’s not that it’s not good. You just need to know that there’s more out there.

And what’s best for you may not be good for someone else.

Ramey: Exactly.

Barbara: Do you mind if I ask how much it costs you to do a year of EMDR? Yeah, I could or your let’s say a year of therapy. How much did it cost for you to do a year of therapy?

Ramey: Let me do my math here because I remember it’s not covered by insurance. So it was, um, 145 dollars a week.

And let’s say I did that. Is there 52 weeks in a year? So. Let’s say I just did that for half the year. I’m still at over three, almost four thousand dollars. If I did it weekly, and it was recommended at that time, I did it weekly not for any reason. It’s just the amount of stuff happening in that time.

Barbara: So, you did a weekly and it was 4, 000

Ramey: For half of a year,

Barbara: Half of a year.

And what you’re paying for this consult is less than that.

Ramey: Exactly. Exactly.

Barbara: There you go. And for less time.

Ramey: Less time, less, honestly, I don’t want to say less effort because I am putting effort into this. But it was just the act of going to therapy, the act of sitting there, the act of just being, you know, that took a lot out of me.

I feel like I couldn’t do anything after that. I couldn’t function. I needed to have a nap and I was drinking then, so maybe I’d have a little drink after it was, uh, it was too much. I need to get, escape it. This, I just feel like it’s more of something I can. Like a little exercise I do and…

Barbara: Yeah, and when you leave here, my hope is that you leave here better

Ramey: Right.

Barbara: And that’s the goal. The goal is that this should not be painful and leave you in a worse state.

That’s been my motto my whole life. Try to get things done in as short amount of time as possible. I’m all about simplifying things so that they can be done faster. And we’re not promising to cure you. I’m not promising anything, but I just want you to be in that seat where you can make these decisions and see the horizon for the way it is and know your options and have hope and get there faster.

And, you know, we may accomplish a lot in six weeks, but I just like to leave it open to the possibilities.

In addition to all the questionnaires that I’m going to be giving you, you’re going to get some more this week. Do you want to know what kind they are?

Ramey: I would.

Barbara: Well, it turns out this was all intentional.

I gave you questions about the general generic questions last week, your history, your past illnesses, medications. Now we’re going to start delving into your family history. And I wanted you to tap first with me before you started that.

Ramey: Well, look at how that worked out.

Barbara: Isn’t that convenient?

Ramey: We didn’t plan this at all.

Barbara: Oh no, not at all. A lot of what I do is intentional. It is organic too. I try to respond and work with your flow. And so, I felt like you needed to wait to get any family history questions before we met for the first time for the tapping.

Journaling, remember you can be a detective; however you want to journal. Noticing, and then tapping I want you to write down, so label them as either a journal entry for sort of how you’re feeling from that day, or as a tapping practice, your log.

Ramey: Well, I really appreciate it and you and all your work and just letting me be here for it.

Barbara: Oh, it’s such, it’s such an honor to work with you.

When you learn to become a systems thinker.

Becoming healthier is not only possible, it’s a lot simpler. And as you heard with Ramey’s experience today, your health is a blueprint, not a map.

I look forward to sharing more of Ramey’s progress in the coming episodes. There’s always another way, and there’s no better time than now to make those changes.

I started Third Opinion MD as a way to spark a wave of change in the way we practice medicine and how we care for ourselves. I believe you can evolve to a much higher level of care by integrating a broader perspective of health by active listening, you begin to understand what keeps you healthy and those things that disrupt the balance.

Be sure to follow or subscribe to this podcast and submit a rating on your favorite podcast player. Third Opinion MD podcast is produced by me, Barbara de la Torre. Music is licensed through Audio Jungle. Any comments made by the host or guest on Third Opinion MD reflect opinions about healthcare and self-care.

Please consult with your own physician for any medical issues that you may be having.

Thank you for listening.

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